


hand covers bruise

by brigsbeebear



Category: That '70s Show
Genre: Character Study, F slur, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Some sexual stuff, idk what this is, it's only a little bit eric/hyde, name is from the social network soundtrack don't @ me, sorta??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-01
Updated: 2018-09-01
Packaged: 2019-07-05 13:14:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15864342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brigsbeebear/pseuds/brigsbeebear
Summary: Eric Forman grows up gay in 1970s Wisconsin.





	hand covers bruise

Eric was nine years old the first time he really thought about his sexuality. It was early in the morning; he had just woken up. He had walked downstairs to find both his parents glued to the television. They were watching the news. They didn't notice him enter the room, and he awkwardly shifted his feet, feeling the ugly green carpet in between his toes.

"Hey, Mom?"

"Oh, good morning, Eric!" Kitty seemed almost surprised that he was up.

"What's going on?" he gestured to the TV, images of fires and people fighting cycling on it, like a morbid slide show.

"You know... you know what gay is, son?" Red hadn't acknowledged Eric's present yet, so the sound of his voice made Kitty and Eric jump slightly. Eric blinked.

"That's like... boys who kiss boys?" Eric looked away nervously. Why was he nervous? That was weird. He had never really thought about... that sort of thing. 

"Yes. Yeah. Well, in the past... gay people were arrested a-and abused by police for being gay. Or for being a boy and dressing like a girl, or for being a girl and dressing like a boy." Eric's brows furrowed, and he glanced at Kitty.

"Um... the police hit them, Eric," she sounded sad. Eric's thick hair swished from side to side as he spun his head back around to glance at Red. 

"Why? Did they do anything wrong?" Eric tried to think of something they did that would make them bad; make them criminals, but he couldn't. 

Kitty coughed. "No. No, they didn't. They were just being themselves. And that's most important, Eric. being yourself. But a lot of people hate gay people because they are gay." 

"So... so what's going on?" Eric couldn't see why this was related to the screams trickling through the cheap television speakers. 

"This time, they fought back. The gay people and the boys who wear dresses and girls who wear suits had had enough, Eric. And it was the right thing to do. Arresting people for who they kiss? that's not America. That's not what I went to war to fight for." He turned to face Eric. "If anyone is ever mean to you like those police were to those folks, and words don't work anymore, you fight back. You kick their asses. Don't let anyone tell you who to be, son." 

Eric nodded. He had never seen his father this serious, and this articulate. Red was still staring at him, and he felt like he was staring into his soul. Like Red knew more about Eric than Eric did. 

He talked to Donna about it. She said she thought it was awesome that people were fighting for themselves. She said she would have joined the riot if she could. Eric said he probably would have, too. He didn't talk to Kelso or Hyde about it. 

That night, Eric laid in bed and stared at his glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling. Was he... gay? He had never really had a crush on anyone, except maybe Donna. Can you like boys and girls? He liked being around Donna. Sometimes, she made butterflies fly erratically in his stomach. But... he felt the same way around Kelso sometimes. and Hyde. Kelso was pretty. Can boys be pretty? Sometimes Hyde sat close to him and he felt something... weird. Eric shook his head, like his thoughts were water left in his hair after a shower. He's not like that. He convinced himself that was the truth, and eventually fell asleep. 

He had the dream when he was fourteen. 

_Eric was sitting in his room, not doing anything except staring at the wall. There was a knock on his window. Well, not a knock. Someone threw a rock at the glass. Like in the movies. Red would totally kill him if there was a dent. He got up slowly, afraid of what was on the ground below. He peeked through the curtains to find a boy with a mop of curly blonde hair and aviator glasses looking up at him._

_"Hyde?"_

_"Eric. let me up." What? Hyde never called him Eric. His stomach fluttered._

_"Um, yeah, is everything okay?"_

_"Yes, just let me up there." Eric opened the window and watched as Hyde climbed up the paneled house, and hoisted him into the room through the window. Hyde closed it behind him, and then stared at Eric. Eric felt embarrassed, regretting his matching Looney Tunes pajamas. He bounced slightly on the balls of his feet and stared at the carpet. Why was he so nervous? It was Hyde. Just his friend._

_"Eric." Hyde said it quietly, and then grabbed Eric's chin and made their eyes meet. Hyde was really close. When did he get that close?_

_"Hyde." Eric laughed nervously, blush spreading over his neck._

_Eric could feel Hyde's breath on his face, and his stomach curled in anticipation. He was painfully aware of how spectacularly gay this was, but he pushed that to the side. All of a sudden, Hyde was kissing him. It was soft, as if he was afraid one wrong move would cause Eric to shatter like glass. They kept kissing, just kissing, and then--_

Eric's eyes shot open. He was in bed, alone. His head was reeling as he tried to make sense of the dream. His brain was in overdrive, like he was in a sports car and he couldn't pump the brakes. He tried to calm down, but then he realized he had another problem. He had a goddamn boner. He forced himself out of bed, ignoring... it, and his mid-sleep epiphany. He took a cold shower and scrubbed his body until it turned red. 

Eric had known this part of himself for a while, but had buried it. Covering it up with self deprecating humor and bad sex jokes. He got sarcastic and jaded, and he continued to grow into that new version of himself. It was bad enough as it was. Red had grown colder over the years, and sometimes Eric couldn't even be around him. He felt so disappointing. But he couldn't do anything about it. So he stayed quiet. He stayed close to his friends, especially Donna. She always treated him like a real person. Everyone still talked to him like a kid, even people his age, but Donna didn’t. He felt bad for not telling her. He felt like a liar. She deserved to know. But he was a coward. A faggot. The word tasted bitter in his mouth. He hated it. He hated it because it made him feel small, smaller than he already was. 

Puberty was in full swing, and instead of getting strong and muscular he just got taller, lankier, and clumsier. His voice cracked more and he was annoyingly horny (for boys. His life really was unfair). That made him even easier to pick on. 

Soon he was fifteen, and a freshman in high school. He did great in school; that was never an issue. It was the people at school. He still had Donna, Kelso, and Hyde, but when he was alone it was as if he had a giant sign that read “I AM A BIG GAY BOY AND NEED TO GET PUNCHED” on his back. The beatings were all bad, of course, but one time stands out. He had stayed after school to study, and was walking home. It was December, and he felt the cold pierce his skin like daggers as he pulled his arms tighter around himself. 

"Hey, Brett, look what we got here." Eric stopped in his tracks as he heard the familiar voice of his antagonizer behind him. 

"Oh, shit, the little fag's on his way home." 

Eric visibly winced at the word, and turned around slowly. 

"Hi, guys, please can I just... can I just go home?" Eric felt his face burn with shame as he practically begged them to leave him alone. How did they even know? Was it that obvious that he liked boys? 

Eric was snapped out of his thoughts when he felt hands slam into his chest, and he felt the wind push out if him as his back came in contact with the concrete. 

"Aw, he wants to go home! Should we let him, Joel?" Brett teased. They had shoved Eric into an alley, and no one was around. No goddamn person was ever around. 

"Hm, let me think... nah. This is more fun." With that, Joel put all his power into a punch that landed right on Eric's nose. He yelped, and immediately tasted the metallic warmth of blood in his mouth. Eric tried to scurry away, but backed right into a brick wall. 

"Nowhere to run, huh?" Eric knew what was coming, and tried to brace himself. He learned early on that fighting back is useless. 

The blows continued to land, and Eric laid curled in a ball on the wet asphalt as bruises bloomed like flowers all over his body. 

"Why-" Eric coughed, and spit out blood. "Why are you doing this? What did I ever do to you guys?" Eric was crying, which made it even worse. He tried to hide it, but his voice came out cracked and high pitched. 

"You didn't do anything, you're just really easy to punch the shit out of. And you're a fucking fag." 

Eric's vision was starting to blur, but he saw a third figure enter the alley. This one was tall, and had long hair. 

"Hey. Leave him alone." Eric knew the voice, but his brain couldn't connect it with anyone. He was too exhausted. 

"Or what, Pinciotti?" Oh. It was Donna. 

"Or I'll beat the fucking shit out of you." 

"Whatever, man. It's not worth it. Let's get out of here, Brett." Eric heard the two pairs of footsteps fade away, and tried to sit up. 

"Hey, Eric. Take it easy." Donna rushed to his side, cradling his face in her hands. "What did they do to you? Those fucking pricks." Eric's vision was clearing some, and he could see her scowling.

"It's... I'm fine, Donna." His voice cracked on the last syllable of her name, and the tears started flowing again. Donna pulled him close, and held him. 

"Donna I'm a-" he sniffed. "I'm a faggot." A sob wracked through his body. She rubbed his back, holding him tighter. 

"No, you're not. You can like boys but you never have and never will be a faggot. Listen to me, Eric. Don't ever let anyone call you that." 

"I'm-I’m so sorry. You don't deserve a fucking pussy for a friend. I understand if you don't wanna be my friend anymore. It's okay, Donna. You don't have to do this." Eric was sick of feeling like a charity case.

"I know I don't, Eric. You're not a pussy, but you're a fucking idiot. Of course I still want to be your friend. I love you, no matter what." Eric pulled away, needing to see her face. He needed to see if this was real. Her eyes were wide, and her lips were set in a determined line. Donna pushed the hair out of his eyes. 

"What do you want me to do, Eric, pinky promise you?" Donna giggled, and then raised her right hand, extending her pinky. 

"I pinky promise I still love you, and still want to be your friend." Eric laughed softly, and curled his pinky around hers. 

"Hey... Donna? Can you not tell anyone?" he looked at the ground. He wondered if the embarrassment would ever go away.

"Of course not, Eric. Not unless you want me to." She hugged him again, and stood up. She reached out her hand and pulled Eric back to his feet. 

"Hey, I know something that could cheer you up." She smiled deviously. 

"What?" He furrowed his brows.

"Have you ever heard of _The Rocky Horror Picture Show_ ?"

"Um, I think so? It's a musical, right?" He tried to feign ignorance. In reality, he had seen the poster in the newspaper his dad was reading a couple days before, and had been thinking about it nonstop since. Donna seemed to know he was lying, but didn't say anything about it. 

"It's playing tonight, do you wanna see it?" She smiled, like she genuinely wanted him to come. He felt his heart begin to feel warm again. 

"Yeah. Yeah, that would be cool." With that, Eric and Donna walked home, chattering nonchalantly about the movie. When they arrived at Donna's house, she told him to come back over at six. 

"Oh shit, Donna, what should I wear?" He felt like that was a gay thing to say. But he didn't mean it to be. He just really wanted to fit in. And besides, he was allowed to say gay things now, right?

"Just something casual, don't worry. Something red or black would be cool. But, really, it doesn't matter. See you at six." She smiled and entered her home. 

Eric had stood in his room for an hour trying to figure out what to wear. He eventually landed on his brown corduroy pants with a red sweater, and his beat up Adidas. He walked into his kitchen, and smiled at Kitty. 

"Hey Mom, is it cool if I see a movie with Donna?" He knew she would get the wrong idea, but that was better than her knowing that he had just come out to Donna and they were going to see a very gay and very sexual musical together. 

"Aw, of course, sweetie! Do you need to eat before you go?" She moved to grab something the cabinets, but he laid a hand on her arm to stop her.

"No, thank you, though. I should be home before midnight. And I already have money. I love you, Mom." He hugged her quickly, and as he walked past Red out his back door he said, "bye, Dad." 

Without looking up, Red said, "have fun, son." 

Eric practically ran to Donna's house and knocked on the door. She opened it quickly, and he took in her outfit. High-waisted dark washed jeans, a white short-sleeved shirt with a rose on it, and red sneakers. She also had makeup on: glitter on her eyelids and cheeks, eyeliner, blush and red lipstick. 

"Woah, Donna, you look awesome." He breathed, and he meant it. She grabbed his sleeves and pulled him inside as she thanked him.

"Oh, and don't worry, my parents are out to dinner." She turned back around to face him. "Now, if you want, I can put some makeup on you, too. It can be subtle, nothing too outrageous if that makes you nervous." Eric's stomach flip-flopped at the idea, but the more he thought about it, the more he wanted to do it. 

"Okay, sure. Um, can I just do, like, something basic? I don't wanna..." look gay. 

"Of course! Let's go upstairs." He followed her upstairs, and remembered that he hadn't been in her room for years now. But Donna dragged him past it and into the bathroom at the end of the hall. She had a small radio already on the counter, and some soft rock song Eric didn't know the name of filtered through the speakers. 

He noticed that she was staring, and he sat down on the toilet and tried not to squirm. 

"Is my outfit bad?" His cheeks were turning pink. 

"No, no! I'm just thinking about what makeup we could do... what are you okay with?"

Eric suddenly got extremely nervous. "I just... I don't..." his breathing was getting heavy. Donna grabbed his hands, and looked at him. 

"Eric, no one there will judge you. And I won't either. Just do what you want to do." He let out a shuddering breath. 

"Okay... um, can I just do like... some mascara and eyeliner? Maybe blush? And like some lipgloss or something? If that's not too much?"

Donna giggled. "At this point, Eric, you don't need any blush. You've got that covered." 

"Shut up, Donna." He laughed and shoved her shoulder. 

"Okay, okay. Will do. I've got everything here already."

The next twenty minutes were spent in comfortable silence, except for the occasional, "look up," or "close your eyes," from Donna. It was silence Eric rarely felt. Usually, silences in his home meant anger, it meant walking on eggshells. Silence around Red was loaded, like a gun. This silence was different. It was intimate, but not sexual. When Eric had his eyes open, He studied Donna's face. She had the same look on her face that she had when she told him she loved him: determination, with a hint of stubbornness. She was too focused on the makeup to notice him staring. 

Eric didn't know how much time had passed, but he felt relaxed and overcome with love for his friend. Donna really was the coolest. He heard her sigh.

"Okay, princess. I'm finished, you can look now." 

He opened his eyes, and it took a second for them to adjust to the light. He gasped quietly and leaned in close to examine his reflection.

"I look... pretty." He was embarrassed as soon as the words left his mouth, but Donna just laughed quietly.

"You do, Eric." 

"Thanks, Donna. Really." He smiled that little smile of his, as if he was afraid to be confident. 

"No problem, man. You ready to go?" 

Eric stared at his pink cheeks and glossy lips, and the eyeliner that made his eyes look bigger and brighter. 

"Yeah, let's go." 

Eric thinks that he will always remember that night. He sees a lot of boys in fishnets which makes him feel all warm, like a chocolate candy that's gooey on the inside. Lots of people (boys, girls, and in between) call him things like "sweetie" or "handsome" and they make his skin buzz. The movie is awesome, and he sees it again with Donna (twice). He got home at around 11:30, and said goodbye to Donna after thanking her for the millionth time as she headed to her house. His makeup was still pretty intact, and he still felt... pretty. 

Eric's parents had gone to bed, but he decided to take the basement entrance, anyway. Better safe than sorry. He opened the door slowly, but froze once he saw the figure on the chair closest to the dryer. Hyde turned lazily to look at Eric.

"Hey, Forman." 

"W-what are you doing in my house? It's almost midnight!" Eric sputtered. 

"My mom is being fucking insane, surprise surprise. Kitty said you were at the movies, but I knew you would be home soon, so I thought I would just crash here anyway." He took a swig of beer as he finished the sentence, his eyes never leaving the television. 

"Well... yeah, you can stay. But don't sneak up on me like that, I almost had a heart attack." Eric plopped down on the dirty couch next to Hyde. 

"I know. you squeal like a pig, Forman." Hyde turned and smiled at him; the first time he'd made eye contact since Eric entered the basement. Eric felt himself blushing, the heat spreading up his neck. He avoided the curly-haired boy's eyes. They watched the television in silence, a heavy tension settling around them that they couldn't explain. Eric felt himself dozing off, until Hyde's voice rattled around inside his skull.

"Woah, Forman... are you wearing makeup?" Hyde giggled, and reached out to touch Eric's face.

"What? No! Of course not!" Eric flinched away from his touch as he stared at his fingers curling into fists on his lap. The room was closing in on him.

"Don't lie to me, man, you totally are!" Hyde's eyebrows raised up above his tinted sunglasses while dimples formed on his cheeks as his smile grew wider. He started laughing, curling into himself on the creaky beach chair.

Eric pulled on his sleeve and brought it to his face, starting to wipe away the makeup. Eric felt hands on his arm, and looked up, trying not to lose all control of his emotions. 

"No. Don't wipe it off." Hyde looked strangely stern, his emotions having turned on a dime. 

"Why? It just makes me a pussy, right?" Eric felt tears in his eyes. 

"No, you're only a pussy if you care what other people think." 

"Well then I am definitely a pussy. And the makeup doesn't help." Eric laughed bitterly. 

Hyde pulled Eric's hands into his, and held them. Eric stared, wide eyed and slack jawed. Hyde leaned forward, invading Eric's personal space. Eric laughed nervously.

"Dude, you're... you're drunk." 

Hyde didn't acknowledge the statement, and leaned in closer. 

"You look pretty. Like a girl, but different. In a good way." 

Eric felt surprisingly soft lips on his. He leaned in instantly, and opened his mouth slightly, slotting their lips together. It was awkward, the arm of the couch was in between them and Hyde's glasses kept getting in the way. But Eric loved it. Hyde was the first one to break the kiss.

"That was my first beer of the night, Forman. I'm barely even buzzed." With that he got up from the chair and shoved Eric aside, sitting next to him on the couch. 

"You're so pretty," Hyde repeated, almost breathing the words instead of saying them. He kissed Eric again, and pressed his right hand onto his chest. His hand slowly moved downwards, and was soon under Eric's shirt. Eric let out a soft moan, and something snapped. Eric shoved Hyde off of him, standing up on shaky legs. 

"No, Hyde, stop. I can't... I'm not..." The panic was back in full force. 

"Dude, you can't make up any excuses right now." Hyde stared at the bulge in Eric's pants. Eric blushed and turned away, heading toward the stairs. He started to run. He turned, staring at Hyde with big eyes.

"Please don't tell anyone, Hyde. God, I hate myself so much. Please. Don't tell anyone." Hyde looked sadly at his lap, fiddling with his ratty jeans. 

"I wouldn't do that, Eric." His first name. Just like his dream. Eric turned and stumbled up the stairs, willing the world to go away.

They both pretended it didn't happen. They were good at that. 

Life went on. As shitty as it was, it was normal. Eric could appreciate that. Kelso started dating Jackie, and she became a new addition to the group. They met Fez junior year, and he had joined their band of losers, too. 

They got drunk, talked about girls, ignored schoolwork, and Eric pretended to be someone he wasn't. He was getting good at that. He had thought about being an actor. Sometimes it didn't even feel fake. He believed his own lies. The belief never lasted, though. 

As if God was adding some full-circle bullshit to Eric's life, when he was seventeen, he had another encounter like the one he had when he was nine. He walked downstairs to find his parents watching the news. It was funny, in that moment, he felt nine years old again. He wished he could be that young again. 

"Oh, look what the cat dragged in." Red commented as he noticed Eric's presence at the bottom of the staircase. 

"This is just terrible." Kitty exclaimed as she entered from the kitchen, carrying coffee.

"What happened, mom?" Eric yawned and walked into the living room, sitting on the piano chair. 

"You know that senator? Harvey Milk?" Eric bristled. He was the gay senator from San Francisco. 

"Yeah. Why?" He breathed out, trying not to give himself away. 

"He was assassinated." Red chimed in. 

"What? Oh my God, what happened?" Eric had watched his speeches whenever he could, and had even cried during some of them. 

"One of his co-workers shot him... for being gay." Kitty sat down on the couch. "I don't want to watch this anymore. Too sad." Kitty stated, getting up again to change the channel. "French toast is on the kitchen table, Eric." She smiled at him.

“Thanks, Mom.” Eric felt like he had lost a close friend. He was killed, in California, for being gay. Eric lived in the suburbs of Wisconsin. What would happen to him? He felt like he was going to throw up. 

“You okay, son?” Red was staring at him. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay.” Eric coughed, and didn't meet eyes with Red. Eric got up abruptly and went into the kitchen. He could hear his father’s voice, muffled by the paneled walls.

“Kitty, that kid is weird.”

Eric wanted to come out. He really did. His sexuality felt like a weight on his chest that grew heavier every day. He was always hiding; from other people and himself. It was exhausting. He could start with his friends. They might give him a hard time, but Donna would be there. She always stood up for him, even when they were little.

He decided he wanted to come out to his friends. He just didn’t know when. 

It was a hazy afternoon in the basement. Eric’s parents were gone, so it was as good a time as any to smoke. Everyone was there; Jackie, Kelso, Donna, Hyde and Fez. Eric felt light and airy, like he could float away at any second. He could hear Fez, Kelso and Hyde arguing but it sounded distant; muffled.

“Dude, I could totally survive on Gilligan’s Island.” Eric heard Kelso say, the whole sentence wrapped in giggles.

“You wouldn’t last a day, man.” Hyde retorted.

Fez laughed quietly. “Kelso… you would die.” Fez laughed again, wiping tears from his eyes.

Kelso thought for a moment, his face scrunched in concentration. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. They don’t have microwaves on that island, do they?” 

They all started giggling, their laughs echoing off of the walls. Soon they were sitting in comfortable silence, the smoke curling around their faces and stinging their eyes. Eric had never felt more at ease with them. He heard his voice before he even thought about what he was saying.

“Hey, guys. Can I tell you something?” His eyes widened almost comically as he realized what he said. They all turned to him expectantly, murmuring assurances. Eric rubbed his eyes, looking like a tired child.

“So...I, uh, I’ve known this about myself for a while, now. I’ve already told Donna, but just because we’ve been friends longer and I feel most comfortable around her. Not that I don’t feel comfortable around you guys, I love you guys, but--”

“Forman. Spit it out.” Hyde remarked from across the table.

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry. Uh, here goes… I’m gay. I like guys.” Eric stared at his hands, an elixir of fear, shame, and embarrassment bubbling in his stomach. The room was silent, Eric’s words floating around like the smoke. Donna looked at him and smiled, and mouthed it’s okay, feeling his anxiety radiate off of him. Jackie spoke up first.

“Oh my God, Eric, I’m so happy for you! I've always wanted to have a gay friend, anyway.” She got up and clumsily stumbled over to him. Eric didn’t know what was happening until he felt arms wrap around him. Jackie’s arms. He slowly hugged her back, surprised at her actions. He didn’t know what he expected from her, but it wasn’t this. The room became silent again once Jackie sat back down; it seemed that even she knew when to keep quiet.

“Eric, I’m sorry about all those jokes I made. Jackie told me I made them because I was uncomfortable with myself and I was lashing out at other people, but it still wasn’t okay, especially now that it turns out you’re actually… gay.” Kelso blurted, his words tumbling over each other in an effort to get out of his mouth. He breathed heavily, as if the statement took a physical effort. 

“We’re all a little gay, aren’t we?” Fez stated matter-of-factly. The rest of the group exchanged looks. 

“I mean, I guess you’re right, Fez.” Hyde barely finished the sentence before he started giggling. He wasn’t laughing at Eric, or Fez, or any of his friends. The absurdity of the situation mixed with the smoke they were inhaling made the laughs erupt out of him. 

“Are you laughing at me?” Fez said, despite starting to chuckle himself.

“No!” Hyde exclaimed as he dissolved into laughter once again. Kelso joined in, but Jackie hit his arm and gave him a face.

“Jackie,” Eric said, starting to laugh himself. “It’s okay.” Soon everyone joined in, and Kelso even fell out of his chair from the sheer force of his laughter. Hyde calmed down enough to stop laughing for a small moment.

“We’re all gay!” Hyde practically screamed, causing everyone to double over once again. Eric met his eyes between giggles, and they exchanged some sort of understanding. We can be ourselves now. Eric hadn’t felt this care-free in a long time. Eventually the laughter died down, and Kelso spoke up.

“Seriously, though, I’m bisexual. Like, since we’re coming out and all.” Hyde smiled and reached across the table to give him a high-five. 

“Dude, me too!”

“Sweet!” Soon, the whole group was sharing a side of themselves they never thought that they could. Eric learned that Jackie “loved women, but also, tragically, loved men” (her words). Donna came out as a lesbian. Kelso and Hyde decided to refer to themselves as “the bisexual badasses” and insisted that everyone refer to them as that as well. Eric noticed that Fez hadn’t spoken up.

“Fez, what’s your sexuality?” Fez thought for a moment.

“Horny.” He stated flatly. Hyde lifted his beer can and smiled.

“Amen.” 

Eric knew it wasn’t going to be easy. Homophobia was everywhere. He still felt in in himself, soaked deep into the cracks of his soul. Despite this, he felt wholly accepted and loved in his shitty, panelled basement with his friends. Everyone told him that he wouldn’t keep in touch with his high school friends, but he knew he would do everything he could to keep these people in his life. If he could, he would tie them to his heart with a string, and store them inside of his chest. They made him feel like the world was okay.

**Author's Note:**

> heyo!! this is my first fic in this fandom and my 2nd fic i've posted so feedback would be nice but pls be kind !!! my tumblr is brigsbeebear !!


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